Lunchtime Thoughts
by JBGilroy
Summary: One-shot looking into the mind of one Valerie Gray one rainy lunchtime. Why does she ghost hunt? How does she feel now she's not an A-lister? (Short but please read)(t rating to be safe)(warning:depression)


**So had this thought for a while and wanted to post it. Didn't think it would fit in a story and so… one shot!**

 **Beware: depressing thoughts – just in case it hits some nerves out there. I don't really like putting these warnings because it's like a spoiler.**

 **I don't own Danny Phantom.**

 **I don't want to speak much more beforehand so I'll let you read the story.**

It was a normal school day in Casper High. The cafeteria was filled with the chatter of the student body. Tables were filled by students. A-listers at one table. Nerds at another. Band members together. Danny Fenton and his two friends at their table in the corner. Valerie sighed softly and clutched the paper bag in her hand tighter. She would prefer to eat outside but it was raining. Quietly, Valerie found a table for herself and dropped her bag to the floor beside her. She pulled out the sandwiches she made the night before and her bottle of water. She ripped off a piece of sandwich and popped it in her mouth.

She was so lonely. Her green eyes settled on the A-listers miserably. Her friends. Ex-friends she reminded herself bitterly. Danny had reached out to her but she didn't feel comfortable hanging with him when Sam Manson was around. That Goth's glare could melt metal. And Tucker Foley… he wasn't as bad as Sam but he was annoying. So she consequently didn't feel welcome at Danny's table. Valerie also didn't want to force herself on others that already had formed their groups. She couldn't play an instrument so she didn't belong with band geeks. Her grades were in the toilet which ruled out the nerds. She doubted she'd follow, let alone enjoy, a conversation with them. The A-listers had pushed her out of their circle. All because of her new-found poverty.

Valerie's sad gaze darkened with anger as her thoughts drifted to the ghost boy. Inviso-bill, Phantom, ghost kid. She didn't care what his name was. It was his dog that got her dad fired. It was his dog that destroyed most of their belongings. It was his dog's fault that they had moved to a tiny apartment across the river in Elmerton, forcing her to get the bus every morning to school before dawn to get to school in time. It was his fault that she had to work humiliating jobs at the Nasty Burger. Valerie had lost everything that mattered to her other than her father. Her home. Her friends. Her popularity. Her money. All gone.

Her father didn't understand. He forbade her from ghost hunting. He seemed to think she only did it for revenge. He seemed to think it was a self-destructive pastime that would get her killed. No, her father didn't understand. Maybe the first time she donned the suit and picked up an ecto-gun it had been her intention to avenge everything her broken family lost. But not anymore. Her father didn't realise that now ghost hunting was her reason to get up in the morning and keep pushing forward. She wasn't sure what her father's reason was. But ghost hunting was hers. It gave her purpose and drive. Something school couldn't do. Something her friends had once provided for her but no longer. The crushing loneliness and loss was inescapable.

Every time she even contemplated giving up her ghost hunting career, she was left feeling hollow. No one would miss Valerie Gray if she disappeared tomorrow. Her old friends didn't care. Danny hardly knew her. Danny's friends disliked, maybe even hated, her. Her father would be better off without her around, one less mouth to feed. But, by defending Amity Park, people would miss the Red Huntress as the news dubbed her. Without their protector, they'd be defenceless. Valerie knew people would argue that the Fentons were around, but honestly… Valerie had seen Jack Fenton in action. That man did enough bumbling to counter-act Madeline Fenton's success. She also knew that some people believed that spook Phantom's act but she didn't. He ruined her life. He was a thief. He attacked their mayor. How could he be a hero?

Valerie folded up the plastic bag she had transported her sandwich in and returned it to her crumpled paper bag. She had to save money after all and the bags were reusable. She put the paper bag in her school bag and opened her water bottle. While she sipped at the drink, her eyes scanned the room, pausing on happy groups of friends jealously. She wanted that back. She wanted to be… wanted again. She blinked out of her thoughts when a loud buzzing came from her school bag. She quickly closed her water bottle and put it away to pull out the ghost detector that came with the suit. A ghost was near. Valerie's self-pity lifted as she scooped up her bag and as casually as possible, left the cafeteria and rushed to the bathroom. Just because Valerie Gray wasn't wanted, it didn't mean she could ignore that the Red Huntress was needed, no matter what her father thought.

 **So… before anyone says unrealistic, I have experienced these feelings. These are actual thoughts I've had in the past. And yes, I'm hinting that Valerie has depression, which I did.**

 **Depression isn't being so sad you want to kill yourself. Depression is feeling so bad and feeling like such a burden that you don't** ** _deserve_** **to be around. And it isn't always obvious to the person that they are depressed. However, like I showed, having a purpose can help fight off the depression.**

 **Yeah… not the happiest one-shot out there but I think it does explain why Valerie ghost hunts, especially after in season 3 when she does catch Danny she states that she doesn't hate him, she just wants to become the best ghost hunter she can. Motive changed and I figure this explains that shift.**

 **But despite the sad theme, I hope you enjoyed reading this one-shot. I know it was pretty short but I figure it doesn't need to be longer. Let me know what you thought. I'm curious how others think of this.**

 **Until the next fanfic.**


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